Becoming a bridesmaid may not be something you’re able to do comfortably. It’s fine to tell the bride that you’d like to be a wedding guest rather than a bridesmaid if you don’t have the resources to devote yourself to such a significant role.
Here are the basic steps on how to back out of being a bridesmaid:
1. Decide Right Away!
Decide immediately if you want to be a bridesmaid or just a guest at the wedding instead. The longer you decide, the more money you’ll spend on things you don’t want or need since the bride will believe you’re thrilled to be a part of her wedding party.
It’s best to have a rigid strategy once you’ve decided. How are you going to tell the world about this? Conduct you plan to do it at home or elsewhere? It’s also crucial to know what you’ll say.
If you can, do it face-to-face and one-on-one if possible. If you’re unsure what to say, tell the bride why you’ve decided not to be a bridesmaid any longer.
2. Tell the Bride-To-Be Your Reason
It’s fine to tell the bride up front why you’re not interested in serving as her maid of honor. When it comes to her pre-wedding activities and requirements, you may not be able to devote enough time to them, or perhaps you reside out of state and can’t afford to go back and forth. It’s possible that you don’t want to put her through the stress you’re feeling at work. Or perhaps you’ve previously been a bridesmaid in three weddings and don’t feel up to participating in yet another one.
3. Make a To-Do List for the Bride
The bride may be furious with you, so have an explanation ready for when she does. Even though you’ll no longer be a bridesmaid, there are still a few tasks that you can help with. It will demonstrate that you’re trying to remain involved in the wedding experience even if you’re not a bridesmaid.
4. If You Don’t Want It, You Can Return It.
Attempt to get your money back if you’ve already purchased the bridesmaid dress. You can return it to the store or sell it to another bridesmaid who hasn’t yet ordered her dress. Both possibilities are viable. You can also look for shops online that resale bridesmaid gowns to receive some of the money you paid back.
5. Don’t Be Afraid To Help Out When You Can
Make regular phone calls to the bride to see how she is doing and if there is anything you can do for her. Just because you’re no longer a bridesmaid doesn’t mean you should lose touch with her. Keep in mind that you remain her friend.
6. Keep the Hilarity For the Aftermath of the Nuptials.
If you’re not interested in being a bridesmaid because of a breach in your friendship, you might want to put off the drama until after the wedding. Now is not the time to re-establish the friendship; instead, focus on making the wedding planning process as stress-free as possible for the bride.
Six Reasons to Abandon Your Duty as a Bridesmaid
Choosing to be a bridesmaid means accepting a lot of responsibilities. You may even think about not being a bridesmaid if the role becomes too much for you.
1. You’re Pregnant, and the Due Date is Near!
A family may not have been on your radar when you accepted the job of bridesmaid. What with your pregnancy (and congrats, by the way! ), it turns out that your due date falls just around the time of your upcoming nuptials. You might be able to attend the wedding if it’s close to where you live, but if you have to travel, you’ll have to comply with your doctor’s directions. If you’re not going to be a bridesmaid because you’re worried about your health or the health of your unborn child, the bride will understand.
2. The Cost of the Wedding has Exceeded Your Expectations.
According to the experts, a bridesmaid costs $1,200 to participate in the festivities of a wedding ceremony. Often, the girls who will be bridesmaids aren’t aware of these expenses when they first take the role.
3. A Job Crisis or Change has Disrupted Your Timetable.
As a bridesmaid, you may be in a situation where you cannot fulfill your duties. If you have started a new work that demands a lot of travel, you may not be able to attend many of the pre-wedding celebrations. Or maybe your present job has become more demanding, requiring you to work later in the evenings and on weekends. Talk to the bride if you think you can’t fulfill your duties as a bridesmaid because of your job schedule.
4. When You Have an Emergency
Taking care of a sick is a tremendous job, and adding becoming a bridesmaid would be too much for most people to manage. It’s appropriate to withdraw from being a bridesmaid if a family emergency arises.
5. On the Day Before the Wedding, You Had a Significant Disagreement.
To be a bridesmaid, you must be able to attend the wedding, and if for any reason that is not possible, you will be forced to leave the bridal party. Unless the bride is incredibly forgiving, you’ll need a considerable conflict before this can be regarded as acceptable. Be aware as disputes arise.
6. The Bride’s Requests are Excessive.
Bridesmaids can be required to meet specific conditions, such as wearing a particular dress or having their hair and makeup done professionally.